When Callings Come Through Growth By Shelli Virtue
As young children, we dream about what we want to be when we grow up
Some want to become astronauts, firemen, doctors, or lawyers. Others dream in the world of arts as singers, dancers, or artists. Although I may have had such dreams as a child, the practical side of life always seemed to win for me. My desire heading into high school was to become an anesthesiologist.
However, the pressure I felt in my home church was to attend a small Bible school which didn’t offer such courses. It was more important to focus on getting an MRS degree, and my backup plan was pursuing a teaching degree. A year into my schooling, I knew teaching wasn’t for me. I switched to the backup plan for my backup plan, which was business. It was not at all a love or a desire for me, but at least something I was good at.
Whatever such intentions I may have had for my life were derailed. During my final year of college, I earned my MRS degree, and soon after, became pregnant. Since then, several of our kids have suffered from various types of epilepsy, with one becoming seriously disabled as a result. My calling found me, being the mother and caregiver to our precious, now adult, son. It may prevent me from ever experiencing an empty nest, but whoever said that was a goal to be achieved? As a parent, my natural instinct is to put all else aside in order to care for my children. It just so happens that one of mine will need me by his side for the rest of his life, or mine.
We become so sacrificial in our giving, we often feel there will be no room, space, energy, or time for a calling based on our heart’s desires. I could have thought that one calling in life was enough, but I was inspired by another which has been such a respite for my own soul’s caring. Being a mostly stay-at-home mom, I felt my interpersonal relationships with others were almost non-existent. I wanted to learn how to build sincere, open, considerate, and receptive connections with other people.
I reasoned that because I was going to invest so much time and energy into it, I may as well record it by producing a Bible study that could encourage others as well. My calling to write Bible studies will only end when I choose to stop growing, I don’t foresee that happening anytime soon. I invite others into my growth process.
By becoming vulnerable, my readers experience the times my faith wanes, the times I find healing, and the times I dig deep into what my faith means.
We all experience slips and surges in our faith. Find ways to spur on your calling with the knowledge you gain from painful and joyful life experiences. For the past five or more years, my family has gone through many pains and sorrows. It hurts! It sucks! And, harder still is hearing all the typical platitudes like “you just gotta have faith,” or “look on the bright side,” or “keep your chin up”! We wake each morning with good intentions to work hard, wield kindness and respect, and write messages of love and purpose to those around us.
As we rest our heads on the pillow at night, we replay the day, fretting over unfinished projects, clashes with people, and a pointless pattern of meaningless pursuits.
We desire deep connections and relationships but can’t bridge the gap between good intentions and actions that matter. Our days are tiring, wanting, and unsurprising. Life feels off, ho-hum, and ineffective. However, our hearts, desires, and intentions seem to be in a good place. We can and will step into our callings with confidence and hope as God spurs us on in our pursuits.
Shelli writes thought-provoking life and faith studies based on the Bible. She isn’t afraid to ask difficult questions and is open to the possibility that her beliefs may not always be accurate. Her desire is to improve relationships, the most important thing in the world, by covering topics that challenge and inspire personal growth. She has currently self-published 3 studies on the topics of relationships, humility, and growing through our pain. Her upcoming study reflects on how our good intentions are not always great. And, her newest writing is taking a deep dive into our faith and beliefs. Shelli has been featured in magazines, recorded guest spots on podcasts, and been in the final episode of season 3 of “The Chosen” as an extra. She spends much of her day caring for her disabled adult son, relying on her husband for tech support, and sipping coffee (her predominant love language!).