The Question and The Statement By Dr. Kate Bohannon
At age 46, I regretfully tell you that I have spent most of my life competing with other women.
My life has centered on proving myself to others, from elementary school science fairs to high-school cheerleading teams. Add to the nature of life as a girl, my first-born status as daughter, granddaughter, niece, cousin; you get the picture of striving for perfection, always needing to prove a point. I am still lost on the point I am trying to prove, but there is always a need to confirm something. I even remember entering the doctoral program of my degree and being told the startling statistic that only 3% of those who start the program finish with degrees in seven years. The race was on for me, and Liberty University would include me in their 3% of graduates. See, there I go again, constantly feeling like I need to prove myself!
And then, a couple of years ago, four verses seemed to jump off the pages of my Bible, giving me insight into the strong discord of competition compared to community.
It was common for Jesus to talk in parables or ask questions when ministering to the disciples and crowds. Often His teachings would create more questions than provide answers, leaving those who followed Him on a quest to learn more. A dialogue between Jesus and Peter in John 20:20-23 gives us one of those unanswered questions and Jesus's famous statement, "Follow Me!" The question from Jesus to Peter, "What is that to you?" is followed immediately with "You follow me!" To understand the context of the question and statement, we need to reflect on the entire chapter of John 21 and know that the conversation between Jesus and Peter concerned John, the author. Jesus appeared to the disciples again for the third time after His crucifixion and resurrection. John notes that there are seven of the disciples together again at the Sea of Tiberias. Jesus appeared to them standing on the beach and instructed them to continue fishing, then bring the catch in for breakfast.
After breakfast, Jesus walked Peter through his restoration with a series of questions. These three questions from Jesus are believed to offset Peter's three denials of Christ during the crucifixion. Jesus sequentially asked Peter, "Do you love me?"
" Peter always replied, "Lord, You know that I love You." Jesus then responded, "Feed my lambs, shepherd my sheep, and feed my sheep." Following their intimate conversation, Jesus told him the prophecy of Peter's death and again extended His famous invitation, "Follow Me!" Peter's take charge kind of leadership immediately turned to concern and curiosity for the other disciples gathered on the beach for breakfast, particularly John, the disciple Jesus loved. Focusing all his attention on John, Peter asked Jesus, "Lord, what about this man?" It was as if Peter baited Jesus to give each of the disciples prophecy on their deaths.
Peter could be saying, ok, that's a great way for me to die, but what about John? What is going to happen to John? Was Peter concerned for John or ultimately competing with him? Was Peter asking Jesus who would have the most glorious ministry and death? In verse twenty, is Peter concerned, curious, or competing with John's future? Though we cannot assume the tone for Peter's question, we can conclude from the text that he is distracted. Only minutes before, Peter spent intimate time with Jesus, restored from his lack of faith, only to turn around and see John. His view of John troubled him and distracted him from obeying Jesus.
I have never asked Jesus, "Lord, what about him?" but I have asked, "Lord, what about her? Lord, why is this considered fair? Lord, why can't I be the one to do that?" All the while I was distracted with what others were doing for ministry or how they succeeded when my life seemed stagnant. The lessons from this passage are wrapped up in the simplicity of Jesus' response to Peter.
The question and the statement are so elementary and yet so profound. Jesus asked Peter, "What is that to you?" and then reciprocated again, "You follow Me!" I believe Jesus is saying to us, "Do not concern yourself with others; only focus on me…follow Me!" I have learned from His question and statement that if we focus on ourselves, we will always compete with others. Yet if we focus our attention and follow Him, we can walk in community or companionship with those same people. Competition came between the two disciples when Peter concerned himself with John's future.
However, when Peter and John focus on the ministry of leading others to Jesus, "fishing for men," their brotherhood continues.
We will always compete when we focus on ourselves and others. Competition comes when we focus on ourselves. We can walk in companionship and community when we focus on Jesus and His Kingdom. Companionship comes when we focus on Jesus. Jesus is saying don't worry about what your sister is doing; put your focus on me.
The challenge for you and me within this passage is to lay aside all distractions of competition and walk in the sisterhood community together, keeping our focus on the one who matters, Jesus! All we need to do is Follow Him!
Dr. Kate is a second wife to Jack Bohannon and a mother to Elijah, Jana, Rebekah, Ella, and Jude Butler. She spends her extra time traveling or planning her next adventure. Dr. Kate believes you can never have too many trips planned on your calendar! Dr. Kate specializes in women’s counseling, single mom coaching, soul care retreats, and soul care coaching. Her calling is to minister to women in need of soul care. Dr. Kate will walk beside you, sharing her knowledge and love for the Lord every step of the way. Metamorphosis releases Summer of 2023, and Soul Care 101 sometime in the Fall of 2023. You can learn more about Dr. Kate, grab one of her free resources, or read the latest issue of The Caffeinated Kate from her website. You can schedule a counseling or coaching session with Dr. Kate at www.set-apart.org.